Changing The World

“Changing the world sounds grand, until you consider how poorly we do even at changing our own little lives. On a daily basis we break our promises, indulge our addictions and rehearse old fantasies and grudges that even we know we’d be better off without. We have changed less about ourselves than we would like to admit. Who are we to charge off to change the world? Our excitement about changing the world can quickly lead us into the grand illusion that we stand somehow outside the world, knowing what’s best for it.” - Andy Crouch

This quote made me pause and brought me down a humble peg or two. Sure, we do change the world and its culture in tiny ways through what we do and create everyday. We’re all culture makers. But scale-wise in the greater scheme of things, the culture we make often doesn’t reach beyond the walls of our inner circles, and unfortunately I think we often end up absorbing way more than we change.

Not at all that we shouldn't try and make every situation and place better for us having been there. Not to say that we aren't called to love deeply, give generously, serve sacrificially and show kindness to all. But I do think in the midst of all that good stuff, we need to be wary of subconsciously promoting ourselves from human being to world-changing God. Wary of when our pride leads us to think that our thoughts and ideas and ventures are God’s gift to the universe.

Actually, I thank God I can’t change the world alone. Because if I had the power to single-handedly change large sections of it, I guarantee that it wouldn’t be better than it is now. Why? One, because my knowledge of the universe and its working is non-existent when compared to the One who made it (Isaiah 55:8-9). I can't see the big picture, I don't know the full story, I can't see behind the scenes, I don't actually know what's best for anyone—myself or the world.

And two, because in my heart of hearts, I’m not a good person. Sure, because of the Holy Spirit in me, I’m capable of doing good things, but too often my motives are driven and corrupted by pride. So I don't know if I would change the world to be better, or just to be better for me, my comfort and my pride. And at the end of the day, that would probably do more harm than good.

So when I love people, when I show kindness, when I go out of my way to serve, when I write on this blog, it’s not so that I, Kelsey, can change the world–although I pray that in some way I do influence the culture and people around me, in whatever small way I can. But I want the overarching goal to be pointing to Jesus, the only One who can truly change the world to reflect what God created it for.

And that brings to mind a quote I read last week that has stuck with me since then:

"God is good at being God." - Lysa TerKeurst

All throughout Psalms, Isaiah, Job, Jeremiah, we see the incredible might and power of our God. God is fantastic at all things, including world changing.

I can’t change the world, but I can point to the One who can.

...In Christ

Life can be so overwhelming. It's busy and stressful and demanding and on the days when everything goes wrong, we can wonder how we are supposed to manage it all.

But this is such a well known feeling, such a common concern, that we really don’t have to look far to find encouragement. The message of “you are enough” is everywhere: over pretty pictures on Instagram, on coffee mugs, in cool quotes on Pinterest. It's spoken over us like a blessing, we are assured that we can do it. We can do all things. We are enough.

Very much like my post on self-care, I do appreciate the motive behind these words. The words are meant to affirm us, calm our fears and reduce the crippling anxiety of life. They're supposed to put cement in our bones so we can stand up, stop complaining and fight the good fight. But in and of themselves, those words will never be enough—because it's not true.

It's like the whole, “God helps those who help themselves,”— it is nowhere to be found in the Bible and is possibly more damaging than we might think.

This is why I say that. When you say that I am enough, you're telling me that I am able to do this on my own. That I myself am sufficient for my life. Being enough means that I don’t need anyone’s help or input. I can conquer, I can fulfill, I can earn my way on my own. Why stop there? Believing I am enough lends me to believe I can overcome anything, even my sins on my own.

Possibly a little dramatic, and I get that this is not what the message is aiming for at all, but I do genuinely believe that too much 'self-belief' feeds my pride and leaves little room for the saving grace and sustaining power of Jesus in me. Because if I am enough, then I don’t need anyone else–including God.

And life where there is no room for God—life separate from God—is quite literally hell.

In fact, trying to live as a Christian without Christ is an oxymoron. He is the very essence and definition of who and what we are. And if we stop to think about it, we're definitely not enough to keep our hearts pumping, much less hold the atoms of the universe together. How then do we assume we can hold our own lives together?

This was the devil's game plan from day one in the Garden. Get them to believe that they have no need for God. I pray that we are not perpetuating that lie in our world today with our inspirational quotes and culture.

It is so vital that we always remember for everything in our lives: "...this is not your own doing (!!!); it is the gift of God.” (Ephesians 2:8)

So we are not enough. What do we do with that? How do we face our overwhelming lives and struggles with that truth in mind?

Well, when searching for 'enough' through the scriptures, Philemon 1:8 answered that. "I am bold enough in Christ." In Christ. Such a simple little phrase, but two of the most powerful words there could be. In fact, Paul uses it over 70 times in his letters.

And like a game that is played in restaurants to change the meaning of the quotes on the sugar sachets by adding on a few words at the end— adding "...in Christ" to the end of "I am enough" changes everything.

Because Jesus Christ is enough.

In Jesus is all the fullness of God, all power, all wisdom, all ability (Colossians 2:9). He is head and authority and sovereign over all things (Ephesians 1:22) This means that he can handle anything, understand everything, know every issue and every solution, and accomplish absolutely all that he wills. He is enough.

Jesus is aboundingly more than enough, for the chaos of this overwhelming life, enough for all the struggles and temptations and inundations.

And you and I, we are in Christ.

“In Christ Jesus you are all sons of God”(Galatians 3:26), which gives us security and identities as kids of the Most High King. We are “created in Christ Jesus for good works”(Ephesians 2:10), which means we not only have a purpose given by God, but also that he will enable us to do what he created us for.

In Christ, we can stand firm and sure (Colossians 2:5), steadfast and anointed for his glory (2 Corinthians 1:21), we stand upright, redeemed and justified (Romans 3:24). In Christ, we are abundantly blessed and made holy and blameless (Ephesians 1:3-4), we are purified and called (1 Corinthians 1:2). In Christ we are complete and full (Colossians 2:10) and can have perfect peace (Philippians 4:7).

The list goes on, but I think you catch my drift.

In Christ. In him alone.

So does this give us a free pass from trying, from working, from doing our best? As Paul once said: “By no means!” We need to acknowledge that we can't do it on our own, but we must also acknowledge that we're not on our own anymore. We belong to God and because of that, he is always with us and we are always in him. God’s grace, which is essentially Christ’s enoughness now lives and works in us, enabling us to truly be enough and prompting us to faithfully and actively run the race he has called us to.

We can make those tricky decisions, because we are in Christ, the fount of all wisdom. We can be kind to rude clients, because we are in Christ, the One who was mocked and despised, yet still loved sacrificially and died on our behalf. We can finish the hard job, overcome temptation, see it through rough patches, because we are in Christ, the Saviour who has overcome the world. And importantly, we can give ourselves grace when we fail, when we aren’t enough—because we are in Christ who already did it all, who lived the perfect life on our behalf, who is not changed by my accomplishments or lack thereof.

We have been given all that we need to live our lives (2 Peter 1:3), but that "You are enough" encouragement too often leaves off the most important part: in Christ. When we lose that, we lose so much. (Sadly we do this with other scriptures too, as I've written about before.)

Focusing on the “you are enough,” gets us stuck on what we can and can't do which will inevitably result in us spiraling into the depths of hopelessness via the pit of pride. Not quite where I want to be.

But when we remember the “in Christ,” the spotlight is shifted. The emphasis changes and the focus is correctly back in place. It's about Jesus, what he has done, what he can do, and what he will do. And it is in this that courage, true, lasting encouragement, is found.

I, on my own, am not enough. Please don’t tell me that I am, for that lie will destroy me.

Instead, let's remind each other of our gracious Savior, mighty King, and empowering Jesus. That his grace is sufficient for us, that he is more than enough for anything we will ever need and that in Christ alone will we find our enough.

I am not enough. But Christ is.

Fail

It's a dumb pride thing, but boy do I hate looking like I don't know what's going on. This has come to light more clearly as I've been living in a new country in the last month. Everything is different: filling up with gas, public transport, banks, shopping, the processes at work. But I don't want people to know that I don't know. I research as much as possible before doing it, and even if I'm still unsure I just plough ahead with a confident look on my face, so that I can keep my uncertainty a secret. It's so silly, I know! I know that the people hardly even notice me, either way.

But I was thinking about this today, and asking myself, "why am I like this?!" I think the root causes are pride and the fear of failure. I say failure because doing something wrong, being lost, or having to ask for help is for me a 'failure' of being the perfect person. 

Failure is the worst. It can really, really hurt. Whether it's a driving test (failing this broke my spirit in the most needed way when I was 18) or math test (yip, got a solid 3% at university once) or failing to live up to my own impossible standards for myself—failure sucks. Its effects reach much further than the failed activity itself and too often can begin to erode self-worth and confidence and the desire to keep going and try again.  

I know it shouldn't be like this. I know that failure is par for the course of life; that absolutely everyone fails repeatedly their whole life long. And I know that this disappointment is simply a feeling that will fade in time. I know, but sometimes just knowing isn't quite enough to shake it. 

So how am I learning to deal with failure? 

1. Separating the failure from my worth and remembering where my worth is truly found

My worth is not found in passing tests, or impressing people, or having a 'perfect' day.

“Are not five sparrows sold for two pennies? And not one of them is forgotten before God. Why, even the hairs of your head are all numbered. Fear not; you are of more value than many sparrows.”- Luke 12:6-7

It doesn’t say, “you are of more value than many sparrows if you get 100%.” It doesn’t say “you are of more value than many sparrows if you are an impressive person.” There is no requirement or threshold or qualification to have worth. Because in the sight of God (i.e. the MOST important being in the universe), you’re immeasurably and immensely full of worth! And because my worth is rooted in him, nothing I do or don't do has the ability to alter that worth, for better or for worse. 

It’s not what I do, or even who I am, but whose I am. My belonging to Jesus is unshakable, therefore my worth in him is unshakable too. 

2. Trusting God's plan and his control

“For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.” - Jeremiah 29:11

My entire life is directed by God. The highs and the lows are within his control. He see the bigger picture, he knows the end of the story and every step along the way as well. He is not surprised, even when I fail, even when everything feels like it's spinning out of control. 

This brings such a sense of peace that I won't ever find by relying on myself. God's got me, through the successes, failures and everything in between.

3. Admitting it hurts, then moving on

Bottling up feelings is never the best idea. I tell myself to man up and harden up and say “I’m fine!” when really, I'm not. And I don't think that helps at all.

I have to remind myself that I'm allowed to feel. That emotions aren't inherently evil; it's how I act out of them that can be. So I'm allowed to be honest about my feelings. I'm allowed to feel disappointed. I'm allowed to mourn the loss of my success.

And the active processing of that allows me to move on. I can't stay in that rut of sadness and pity all the time, otherwise it will become too comfortable and too much like home. I think it's important to acknowledge the feelings, but never to let them dictate me. 

In order to move on, I have to remind myself that it's not over until the fat lady sings, and she ain't singing until the day I find myself face to face with Jesus. It's important to fully live through this chapter, feelings and all, so that I can freely turn the page to what is next. And there are still so many other chapters to be lived out. My failure is not the last sentence in my story.

Not that I'm an expert in this by any means, but by taking little baby steps, I am starting to find that failure and the fear thereof doesn't have to define me. I'm growing in my ability to shake off the failure and try again. To step out and do new things, even when I'll likely fail the first time, because I'm learning that it doesn't for a second impact my identity and worth. 

Jesus told his disciples that they would have trouble and tribulations in this world, but his solution to that wasn't to simply give up. He called them to be of good cheer and take heart, trusting in his overcoming power. The same is true for us. No matter how big or small, let's step out and do the things we need to do, trusting in Jesus for our worth and story, and knowing that failure is only one step toward those goals.

Today I saw a Facebook memory from 7 years ago where I had shared a quote from Jon Acuff:
"Though fear tries to tell me otherwise, the truth is that the size of my failures will never eclipse God's ability to redeem them."

So I just wanted to write all this to remind you (and me) that life is more than a list or a certificate or an achievement. That your failure will never trump Jesus. Because failure and its feelings are not forever. But Jesus and his love are. 

Shipwrecks And Storms

"When neither sun nor stars appeared for many days and the storm continued raging, we finally gave up all hope of being saved." - Acts 27:20

I've just finished reading through Acts. At the end of the book, Paul and Co experience the craziest series of unfortunate events. This scripture is describing a terrible storm they were in that led to them being shipwrecked and marooned on an island. But when I read this particular verse it caught my attention and brought to mind the crazy wave of depression and hopelessness and suicide that is currently sweeping the world.

The darkness: no sun or stars to light the way and give guidance and something to look forward to, no purpose to live for.

The raging storm: the inner turmoil of thoughts and the despair that screams louder and feels more powerful than any strength that can be mustered up in ourselves.

The giving up of hope: the succumbing to the hopelessness that says we are too far gone to be saved, that says we are not loved, that we are not worthy of love and that no one cares of our existence or non-existence on this earth.

Even just typing that all out feels a little terrifying, that someone would be in that place. And sadly, way too many people are stuck in this place of hopelessness; where it feels like the light will never break through and the storm will never end; where they are too far gone to be saved.

I don't say this lightly, but the reality is, there is no such place! No night is too dark for God's light to pierce in, no storm is too wild to be commanded by him to be still, no place is too far or too hidden or too wicked to be rescued by Jesus.

"The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it." - John 1:5

The darkness has not and will not ever overcome the Light of the world, Jesus. Ask him to shine in your life. Even if there is just a little pilot light left in you, fan that thing into flame and let the Light burn in you and dissipate the darkness.

"A furious squall came up, and the waves broke over the boat, so that it was nearly swamped. Jesus was in the stern, sleeping on a cushion. The disciples woke him and said to him, “Teacher, don’t you care if we drown?” He got up, rebuked the wind and said to the waves, “Quiet! Be still!” Then the wind died down and it was completely calm." - Mark 4:37-39

Jesus, the Prince of Peace, offers us peace in the midst of the storm. Even when the wind and waves are raging, we can find rest in him. He has complete dominion over everything, the natural elements of physical storms, as well as the hormones and crazy mental world that can be so tumultuous. And he does care. He hasn't brought you out in the boat with him to drown, but in the midst of the storm, he does want you to trust that nothing is out of his control and that he cares for you.

“Everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved.” - Romans 10:13

It seems too good to be true. But God cannot lie. So when he says that if you call on him you will be saved, then I totally believe with everything in me that absolutely anyone can be saved. There are no filters or preconditions to this saving, which means that no one can ever be too far, or too bad, or too unworthy. Because the 'goodness' and the 'worthiness' of the saving is all on Jesus, and not on us. Through him, anyone can be qualified and all can be saved.

I know that there are many other factors and things to consider when it comes to depression and hopelessness. But I do believe that these are three pillars of truth that are foundational in living a life of hope in Jesus.

I love what Paul says two verses after the hopelessness of their situation is so strongly stated: "I urge you to keep up your courage, because not one of you will be lost; only the ship will be destroyed."

Yes, the ship will be destroyed—we will lose possessions, our plans will go awry, we will deal with devastating loss and heartbreak. But not one will be lost. You will not be lost. God holds you safely in the palm of his Almighty hand. I pray that today you would find such peace, light and hope in that.

Finally, perhaps, like me, this is not an area that you find yourself struggling with right now. If so, let's take after Paul's example of standing in the gap for the people around him:

v25 "So keep up your courage, men, for I have faith in God that it will happen just as he told me."

Would we have faith in God for the people that can't find the faith in their darkest moments, and would we stand alongside them in their rocking boat and raging storm and speak the truth to them, helping put courage in them to stand, to keep going and to fight once more.