X's & No's

Have you ever found yourself with an expectation that you feel like God just isn't meeting? A shattered dream that you so believed God had placed in your heart. A never ending cycle of disappointments. A plan that you had so perfectly crafted going completely awry.

Right now across the world there are a million different versions of “Don’t you see me God?” happening. And so we doubt and get angry and lonely and we shake our fist at the sky asking why.

In Genesis 48, something like this happens to Joseph, of the technicolour dreamcoat fame. He has brought his two sons to his father Israel for his blessing. Culturally this was a critical, massive, pre-planned thing that was about to take place. The oldest son was about to receive Israel’s blessing. At least, that's what Joseph had expected and planned. He placed all his ducks (i.e. his sons) in a row, strategically positioning them to ensure things all went according to his, and what he was so convinced was also God's, plan.

But then his father crossed his arms. 

An X was formed that resulted in the wrong son getting the blessing. An X was formed that led to Joseph's plans and expectations being rudely ignored. 

This change of plans did not sit well with Joseph. How dare Israel not follow the tradition and the plan?! Joseph even tried to literally force his father's hand to change it to be how he thought it should be. Joseph says, “No, my father, you're wrong, this one is the firstborn; put your right hand on his head.” expecting the reply of: "Oh whoops, my bad, let me quickly fix that for you."

But Israel's reply is something entirely different. He says, "I know, my son, I know."

What a thing to say to someone watching their dreams and plans crumble. "I know. "

And in the midst of our broken hearts, missed dreams, failed plans, unmet expectations, I believe our Father with his arms crossed in an X says this:

"I know, my son, my daughter, I know. That thing you long for is not going to happen. Not the way you’ve always dreamed. I know this hurts and stings and confuses all you know. I know you feel like I am distant and unaware of where you are and who you are and how you think life was supposed to turn out. I know right now you doubt that I have your best interests at heart. But know for certain that I am not done. I have barely even started to reveal my goodness to you. I am the God who satisfies your desires with good things. It's who I inherently am! And when it comes to your hopes and your longings and your dreams, I know. I perfectly know."

In the midst of the X's and the no's, He knows.

Dark Days

Genesis 15:12-13

"As the sun was setting, Abram fell into a deep sleep, and a thick and dreadful darkness came over him

Then the Lord said to him, 'Know for certain…'"

The darkness was dreadful, but in the midst of that dreadfulness came the voice of the Lord. In the darkest of dark days, God spoke to Abram and reassured him of His presence, His plan and His peace.

It's said that if one sense is not able to function properly, the other senses become more acute and effective. I believe that often God allows the dark days so that we stop looking for a way out, and start listening for God’s way out, for His voice and His plan.

The darker the night, the brighter is His light. He is right there, waiting to speak.

Even in the dark days, find the Lord.

Just Keep Walking

Genesis 6:9

"This is the account of Noah.

Noah was a righteous man, blameless among the people of his time, 

and he walked with God. "

Noah "walked with God." It's a pretty simple really, but it's something we easily miss because we get distracted by the big old ark.

I believe it's not a coincidence that before God tells Noah to build the ark, before Noah gets his mission and plan of action, he was a man who simply walked with, lived life in step with God. Maybe Noah wasn't even surprised when God told him the plan. Maybe years spent walking with his God taught Noah that nothing was impossible?

So often we want the mission and the building and the big ark moment right now. But maybe God wants to walk with us first. Maybe He wants to hang out, like He did with Noah, and just be with us, enjoy us, before He reveals some massive mission. Maybe He wants to take a thousand walks with us before He sends a single raindrop. Maybe I need to be taking one small step with God instead of trying to take one giant leap for my-kind.

I think we all need to be walking before there's any water. And whether the water comes or not, keep walking, waiting, watching and worshipping.

Walk with God.

Exams, ugh

Having finished school, varsity and my qualifying board exams, I am in the delightful space of never having to write another exam again in my life. But many of my friends are still having to write exams, and lately I've heard a lot of "Why do I even have to write stupid exams anyway?!"

Fair question. Exams are stressful and annoying and time consuming. Sometimes they just seem like setting ourselves up for certain failure. Surely life would just be better without exams to bring us down?

Could I be so bold as to say no? No, life would not be better without exams. And this, I believe, is why:

1.  To teach us to rely on Jesus in stressful times

If you think your school exams are the most stressful situation you'll ever find yourself in, I'm afraid that you're living in a dream Disney-like world. There will be tough times ahead in your life. And God uses where you are right now as a training ground to prepare you for what lies ahead.

When we are stressed, it's so much easier to shut down than to rely on God to be our strength. But exams are a great time to practice Philippians 4 which says, "The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."

As you pray, as you learn more and more to trust that Jesus is bigger and better than anything you may be facing, it becomes more real and easier to do. Jesus said that "he who is faithful in a very little thing is faithful also in much." Relying on God through your exams and in your busy, stressful schedule now will set you up to rely on Him in the even scarier situations you will have to walk through later in life.

2.  To teach us hard work. 

Becoming all that our Creator has made us to be will require some hard work on our part. Not in the striving, "I will make myself a better person" kind of way. But just in the reality of living out our faith daily we will have to be strong. Spiritual, mental, emotional and physical muscle is needed to run the race we've been called to, and building muscle requires hard work and doing the right thing over and over again.

Sometimes this means you have to do things you really don't want to do. Having the experience in completing unpleasant and unwanted tasks when we’re younger prepares us for the hard situations we’ll have to face when we’re older.

Actively and diligently studying helps build in us an ability to persevere through the hard tasks that God has presented us with and allowed in our lives for our good.

3.  To teach us that even the most menial tasks can be for His glory.

It is easy to look at school as something separate from our walk with Christ, but actually everything in our lives has a purpose. If our chief end is to glorify Jesus, that includes glorifying him in our studying. 

This means giving of our best, because God gave us His best in the person of Jesus. This means applying ourselves fully in our homework, projects and exams. It doesn't mean we all have to be top of the class, but I do believe we are all called to be the best that we individually can be. 

1 Corinthians 10:31 - "So whether you eat or drink, or write an exam, or do a project, or submit an assignment, or draft an essay, whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God."

Obviously there is a flip side to this, where we can be so caught up in doing well in our exams that we lose sight of everything else. That's not healthy and will definitely result in disappointment and heart break, sooner or later. 

What I'm talking about is a lifestyle of actively seeking first Jesus and His kingdom, with an aspect of that being, at this stage of your life, diligent and God-glorifying studying. I firmly believe that these do not have to be, and should not be, at all mutually exclusive. 

I pray that you see God's plan for you, even now in the studying. Ask Him to show you His purpose for this current pain. And then own it, with everything you have in you. It will all be worth it in the end. 

Work hard.

Trust God.

Anxious

Phil 4:6

"Do not be anxious about anything."

Here is another scripture (like I spoke about in Yoda Grammar) where we so often just forget about the context that it was given in, and try to make it something we can do on our own.

Anxiety is a real thing. Very often it's not something that we can just turn off or get over. So how can God just casually tell us to not fear, to get over our anxious little selves?

Well, he doesn't. See, there are two key things that sandwich this "do not be anxious" in:

1. "The Lord is near."
2. "The peace of God will guard your hearts."

Let's break these two wonderful truths down.

The Lord of heaven and earth, the Maker of the universe, the Holder of the sun and stars, the Creator of life, he is near to you. He is near to you to keep you, protect you, love you and build you up. He is near, so why do you fear? 

It's his peace that guards our hearts. We don't have to muster up a fence around our hearts to protect ourselves from the worries of the world. Jesus has got you covered. His peace is knowing that God is sovereign and is always 100% in control. It's knowing that nothing takes God by surprise. It's knowing that his plan for you is perfect, and that he can and will turn all things for our good. As someone once said "Never be afraid to trust an unknown future to a known God." His peace is living in that beautiful place of knowing. 

And the how? The how is to "in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God." Pray like cray! Pour out your heart to Jesus. Tell him your worries, your fears, your hopes and dreams. Like it says it Hosea 7, "They do not cry out to me from their hearts but wail on their beds". How often do we moan and groan and complain to everyone around us, and forget that the Lord is near? He longs to hear your heart and your cries, in every situation. 

His peace is bigger than anything you could ever face. Do not fear. 

Cast your burdens onto Jesus because he cares for you. Do not fear.

The Lord is near. Do not fear. 

Yoda Grammar

"I can do all things." 

"We have peace with God."

"Such confidence we have."

Ah, nothing like some nice, encouraging, strengthening scriptures like these, right? Hand letter these things and put them up on Pintrest!

No, please don't. Because these are so utterly meaningless without the second halves of the sentences that I left out. This is what they actually are:

Phil 4:13 "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me."

Romans 5:1 "We have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ."

2 Corinthians 3:4 "Such confidence we have through Christ before God."

Seems obvious that we can't take only half the scripture. Yet how often, in the same way, do we tend to leave out the 'through Jesus' part of our lives? How often do we try to have strength and peace and confidence outside of Jesus? And just as often as we try, we fail. Because it is through Jesus, and only through Jesus, that we live and move and have our being.

So I like to go all Yoda on these scriptures and reorder the sentences to change it up in a way that helps me remember the true order of life:

"Through Christ who strengthens me, I can do all things."

"Through our Lord Jesus Christ, we have peace with God."

"Through Christ before God, such confidence we have."

Through Christ, I am.

P.S.

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